So, today is the highly anticipated final season premier of LOST. For people like @kristenbowie @bella_devil and @devlynpdx, this is a TV show. The best TV show known to man. The TV show that people without TV’s flock to bars to watch, a TV show that makes men pee their pants, and most importantly a TV show that makes people yell insanities aloud like “noooooo……we were supposed to be together” and “not pennnnnnnyyy”. So, in preparation for the premier of LOST at the Baghdad on Hawthorne, presented by Cort and Fatboy, I have listed my predictions for the final season below.
1. Shannon is going to come back from the dead and make sweet love to Locke in the hatch.
2. Einhorn’s a man! Similar the scenario in Ace Ventura “Pet Detective” we are going to find out that Penny is a man, therefore making Desmond a flaming homosexual.
3. Hurley will eat Jack
4. The characters will realize that they are not lost and are actually in a prison camp formerly known as Guantanamo Bay.
5. The lockness monster is actually the remanence of Sayid’s pubic hair.
6. Sun will murder Ben with Pai Mei’s five-point palm exploding heart finishing move.
There, now I feel better.
